i was already writing about something for, i don’t know 500 words or more with few pictures in it. and suddenly, while i was writing the ending, my focus was distracted. a good friend of mine suddenly offered me for a graduating teddy bear and i was interested to have one.


little did i know that this would continue to something way deeper than just a chit-chat.


it’s been a long time since the last i saw him. usually we meet on his faculty’s canteen, where i enjoy a bowl of meatballs they sell. light conversation, about how’s life, when to graduate, and jokes about who’s dating who.


this night, our chat started that way too. he’s teasing me about who i’m dating with, and asking whether i wanted to date a bad boy or not, lol. then i counterattacked him. when will your marriage be held?


and suddenly, the chat’s turning really intense.


he said that he’s lack of experience in raising child, also he hasn’t earned anything, so it’s still a long way to talk about marriage. i said that in raising child, you don’t have to be perfect cause theoretically, there’s no perfect parents. either you’re being too good or too bad will leave a crack.


we did agree, though, that raising child is a big thing to deal with. and we couldn’t talk about raising child without mentioning marriage. in that case, marriage is also a big deal. it’s not easy.


when we’re already married to somebody, we have to be considerate, basically about everything. particularly, financial. nowadays, we face world with very competitive jobs. it’s difficult enough to find a job we enjoy, let alone the job that will pay the rent.


then, innocently, i stated:

“i don’t really get the concept of marriage, actually”

“besides to add more population. and move out from parents’ home”

he replied:

“hahaha same here -_-“


that’s one truth.

do i want to marry? of course i do. i really do want to marry the one that his name’s been uttered in my prayers lately.

what i don’t get is the concept of when will we be declared ready to marry. age related? job related? what?

many people i know are already tied in marriage vow in their early twenties. i’m 22, and i think i’m more of like Taylor Swift’s song instead of a woman who’s ready to change my child’s diaper.


few moments after that, my friend said that sometimes he wondered, that he imagined playing with his baby boy – he already decided boy instead of daughter, hahaha. while i’ve always wanted twin boys. well, it’s still far, but time runs fast.


one of these days, we might still think relationship as how to constantly communicate, see each other often, or maybe go out and have dinner. but there will come the time when the boys are not boys anymore, but husbands and soon to be fathers.

and the girls, to be the wives then mothers.

the time when your relationship is called family, and you fathers have to work hard to fulfill your family needs.

the moment when us mothers, put our lives on the table to give birth to our child, or even children.

the age when fathers and mothers have to struggle to give their best to their children.